
I'm Just Not a Maths Person: Maths Anxiety in Children
Maths anxiety is a working-memory problem wearing the costume of a personality trait.
Reviewed by Sian Trombley, CCCFounder, Thrive Family Company
8 min read
Best for parents of children who are…
- finding school days hard to get through
- worrying often, or asking the same question again and again
- being hard on themselves
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The homework is four questions long. Three of them are done. The fourth one is identical in structure to the first, and the child is staring at it as if it were written in another alphabet.
This is the moment most parents reach for explanation — a clearer method, a worked example, another go. It rarely helps, because the obstacle is not comprehension. Fear has taken up the mental workspace the child needs in order to hold the numbers still while they work on them.
How the loop forms
- 01A public stumble
A wrong answer said aloud, a timed test, a classmate finishing first.
- 02A story forms
'I'm bad at this.' The brain now treats maths lessons as a threat setting.
- 03Avoidance begins
Slower starts, forgotten books, toilet trips during maths. Less practice follows.
- 04Performance dips
The dip is taken as proof of the story rather than a consequence of it.
- 05The identity hardens
By eleven, many children can tell you with total confidence what they are 'not'.
What makes it worse
What to do at the table
- Start with a question they can already do — confidence first, difficulty second
- Let them narrate the steps aloud
- Write the problem down rather than saying it; reading reduces memory load
- Stop at the first sign of a freeze, and return in ten minutes
- Praise the strategy, never the speed
- Keep sessions short: fifteen good minutes beats forty tense ones
'I'm not a maths person' is not a fact about a brain. It is a conclusion drawn after being made to feel slow in public.
Sian Trombley, Canadian Certified Counsellor
What you can try this week
Remove the clock
Untimed practice for two weeks. Speed is the single most anxiety-provoking feature of maths and the least important one at home.
Change the sentence
Replace 'I'm not a maths person' with 'I haven't learned this one yet' — every time, without a lecture attached.
Say the steps out loud
Have your child narrate what they are doing. Speaking offloads working memory that fear is otherwise occupying.
- Maths anxiety reduces available working memory in the moment.
- The child's ability has not changed — their access to it has.
- Speed and timed drills reliably make the loop worse.
- Parents' own maths anxiety transmits, especially during homework.
- Short, low-stakes, untimed practice rebuilds confidence fastest.
What does my child's face do in the ten seconds before they answer?
Have I ever said 'I was hopeless at maths too' in a way that felt like permission to stop trying?
Where has speed crept into practice that does not need it?
Printable resources
Recommended Thrive courses
This article is educational and is not a substitute for individual clinical advice. Comments are closed so the Journal stays a calm place to read.
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